Day 3 & I feel like its the last day...

Well today was not a good day...

I got up, had my morning shake, did some house work, took my meds around 10, then headed to the pool. Had a nice time relaxing enjoying the sun for about 45 mins then the headaches started again. So I packed up and went upstairs. Took some more Motrin (I think I am keeping them in business) and tried to relax. Had another shake thinking that maybe it was a hunger headache...that did not help. By this point I had enough and went to lay down. Now the room is spinning and I feel like I am car sick (best way to describe) so I threw my hands in the air, and called Jessi.

I called her and told to meet me at On The Border and I was going to eat something besides a shake or a power bar. I love their Kids Grilled Chicken Plate...chicken breast, side of black beans & a dinner salad=230 calories! Perfect...my head was feeling better & I was ready for a nap. I took a pretty long nap this afternoon and felt much better when I woke up around 4:45ish.

Then came 7:00pm again...and no surprise headache is back, nausea is back (no vomiting yet) and just feel like I could fall over and play dead. Took a hot bath and now ready for bed.

I am not saying this diet is a bad diet, it just works different with different people. Some people do great on Weight Watchers, while some excel on Atkins Diet/South Beach. Everyones body is different. So, I am heading in early to work tomorrow to weigh-in and discuss the next step with my doctor.

Of course typical me...I AM A LOSER, I CANT DO IT, ITS TO HARD, NOTHING WILL EVER WORK is running through my head. And I know that there are people that will look at me and say "told you it would not work" I am going to prove you all wrong!! Whether its this diet or another this weight is coming off!!!! I have had the jump start with the 5.7 loss this week and I have my mojo back to stay focused...FOCUS :) haha!

So, stay tuned for tomorrows update after seeing the doctor.

Day 2...

5.7 pounds!!!!!!

I was so happy this morning to get on the scale and see that I had lost 5.7 pounds in a week...how great is that!

Went to Sherman today to spend time with Daddy for his birthday. We went to church together which I know he loves when my sister or I can go with him. For those that dont know, this is the church that we grew up in. Most of the members have known me since I was just a little kid sitting at the front enjoying Childrens Time. It was so wonderful to see these faces that I had not seen in a few years. They made me feel like I had never left.

This diet, and other things have turned me into this crying mess. Today driving up old Hwy 289 I cried. Passed some spots that I remember from when I was a kid. Today during worship they introduced the Class of 2010 graduates. The minister said that no matter where you go to school, no matter where you get a job, or no matter where you move off to you will always have a place here. That is how I felt today, like I was still that little kid getting ready for Children's Time.

Today I wish I was that kid again, and that I could just start over. I would do things so different in my life. I might have taken a different path in my life. I do know for one thing, I would have never let my weight take over my life. I kick myself everyday for letting it get out of control. People in my life have always said encouraging words on how to help me. I aways thought I had it "under control" I sure was wrong. Why did I not listen, all they were doing was trying to help me...and now look at me...I am a mess.

Yesterday I started taking Phentermine, a diet medication to help with my cravings. Yesterday evening around 7:00ish I got this horrible headache, then the nausea kicked in and away to the bathroom I went. I thought it was just the bad ice tea I had picked up from McDonald's as a treat to myself. Well, tonight around 7:00ish it hit again and away I went. Can blame the tea this time. So, come Tuesday I think my doctor and I might need to re-evaluated this. I can handle my tummy growling, but when the headaches kick in and the room starts spinning...I am done.

But, on a happy note...Daddy & I were joined by some wonderful friends today for lunch. The Buechler's & Pinon family. The "ladies" of the table discussed our diet owes over the years, and what has work..and well you know what happens if they dont :) It was great to talk with them. You always feel like you are in a battle by yourself, and people tell you all the time "Oh I understand, Oh I have been there" It really does help. *And I enjoyed 4 oz of grilled catfish and brocolli for lunch & lots of water!

So, I think it is time for me to call it a day. Thinking about going to the pool again tomorrow, but just laying around the house watching TV sounds good too. Oh, and a nap goes without saying. Thanks for everyone who sent me notes yesterday after the first blog. I really did this as a place for me to vent and discuss what I am feeling, but maybe I can help someone not go down the same path or even better...we can start a new path together.

Another day...

Well, today is another day in my battle with my weight. My friend Jessica suggested maybe I start blogging about my everyday challenges. My mom has always told me that writting your feelings down in a journal helps...so here is my journal.

A week ago, our office became a branch of The Center for Medical Weight Loss. A low calorie, doctor monitored liquid diet. 800 calories a day of shakes, pudding, and 1 power bar. Sounds like fun right...not so much. Everyday has been a challange, everyday there has been tears, and everyday I want to quit. I am trying really hard to look at the BIG picture 6 weeks-12 weeks down the road, but for me its a day to day challange...somedays shake to shake challange.

Today I started taking Phentermine to help with my food cravings. Reading reviews of this med makes me think that maybe I have finally found something to help me. You have to take the med a hour before breakfast and it works all day...we will have to wait and see about that!

This week was really hard. Not sure what is really main cause for all the crying...could it be the new diet, switching to Wellbutrin, new computer system at work, or all of the above. Plus, someone I trusted hurt me again...what a fool I am. I do have the greatest support system. Mom & Doyle everyday are cheering me on & telling me that I can do it, even when I cant believe in myself. Dr H, checking on me day after day...she has to fight this battle too but is always there to check on me. My friends are the greatest, several are doing the diet with me. They understand the frustrations & days where you feel like you cant do it anymore. They tell me its OK to cry, since they are crying and holding my hand too.

So today, to keep my mind off my stomach growling and wondering how busy Chick-fil-a will be on a Saturday. I am off to get Daddy's B-day gift, then off to the pool, then maybe get a mani/pedi.

Tomorrows plan is to head to Sherman for church & lunch (4 oz grilled chicken & veggies) with Daddy and some friends to celebrate Daddy's B-day!

Monday, more of the pool & if I have time maybe clean the apartment...hehe!

Well, I guess that it is for my first blog. Lets see where this leads...